i have the secret!!!!!! here it is....... my whole life i was very thin naturally. i actually had to try to eat more to gain weight. my mom was the same way. then i had 4 babies in five years!! and i learned that i could not eat as much anymore. it was really strange. after my first baby the weight was not so hard to get off but after my 2nd i was thinking what is going on here?? so i had to work at it. but the real secret is ........do not ever go on a diet!!!! eat what you want but in SMALL PORTIONS and many, many times throughout the day. DO NOT let yourself get hungry. grab whatever you can....an apple and some cheese, or whatever but do not let yourself get too hungry because then your metabolism stops. just be sure your meals are small portions and that your snacks are small too. eat whole foods!! drink lots of water but do not put it in place of food. for excercise forget about the complicated stuff and just walk, walk, walk. put the baby in the stroller if you have to and walk. be sure it is a brisk walk so you are working your body. and remeber you do NOT have to do hills. just a couple of miles everyday and the weight will melt off as long as you are not over eating. (if you have to miss a walk for any reason then turn on your favorite music and dance like crazy in your house for 45 minutes. you will have fun and so will your kids. if it is after they are sleeping you will entertain yourself.....or your husband. so, there are no excuses because you can always turn on the music and dance if you can't walk.) i have never been on a diet in my life and i am 5' 8" and weigh 121. after my 4 babies i would be huge if i did not follow this lifestyle of good eating and walking. i promise you the baby fat will melt off. also your tummy will not allow you to over eat once you get it used to smaller more frequent meals. if you eat too much at one time your tummy will feel so sick. also remember if you want desert pace yourself with what you are having for your whole foods. whenever we go out dinner i always keep in mind that i want desert so i am sure not too eat all of my food so there is room for desert. i just eat a small amount of pasta or meat and veggies and i always take home lots of leftovers from restaurants. It is so yummy the next day. And trash the microwave!! heat your food the old fashioned and healthy way...on the stove. everything tastes so much better and you eat better food and you teach your children about real cooking. we have the most amazing kitchen and no microwave. also trash the scale!! we have never had a scale since we lived together. your pants and the mirrror will tell you if you feel good about your weight. i only know how much i actually weigh when i go to the doctor. also, i would not set a goal of have to do it by a certain date or for a certain event because everyone that does that always gains it back. you need your brain to click and say i want to change my life. i want to enjoy eating and never be on a diet or feel like i am excercizing for a certain weight etc. you have to do it for you. for everyday life. when i was pregnant and had a belly for the first time in my life and i could not see my own vagina when i looked down i thought that was the strangest thing ever. or when my husband had to help me to tie my shoes. i thought to myself , "how is anyone really content inside when they can't look down and see their own private parts or tie their own shoes without a struggle." it is really about how you want to live and not about an event or how other people look at you. Really, think about if you are ready for a real change so not to deprive yourself but rather to eat whatever you want just in small grazing portions like was meant for the human body. but remember to think healthy for the most part. you can have the unhealthy things too just in moderation. let us know how it goes with walking and eating smaller more frequent meals and healthy snacks. and enjoy your deserts!! who wants to hang with a girl who can't have desert with you!!!!???? or pasta for that matter. all the best and let us know how it goes.

I can relate to this problem. 2 years ago I decided to lose 30 pounds for my class reunion. I did it by joining Jenny Craig and met my goal in about 3 months. However, sinse then I have slowly gained most of it back because I didn't change many of my habits. I think if you can choose something that you can't change as motivation like a christmas party or special gathering. Be sure to remind yourself often of the date of the event. Just be sure to implement more excersize as you get closer to your goal so that you don't end up gaining it back like me.

I know you can do it! Good luck!

P.S. treat yourself to a day at the spa when you reach the 15 or 20 pound mark.

I agree with the post that says make attainable goals. If you aim too high & don't make it you'll feel depressed. Just pick a smaller goal -- like 1-2 pounds a week and keep at it. Bearing in mind that you'll go up & down a 1/2 pound or so here and there due to hormones etc. Just keep at it. I lost about 20 pounds since last year. I still have a ways to go, but feel better about the energy I've gained as I've lost the weight. Good luck to you! :-)

Find something you love to do that also burns the calories...like mt. biking or rollerblading.

I think the key is to keep it to small, attainable goals. 45 pounds is way too much to think about all at once, and would be overwhelming I think. Make a goal like 2 pounds/week. Good luck!