I can tel you why...all of my children were and are equal; there were no favorites, just as you said . Looks, grades, talents...it mattered not; however, when grandchildren come along, I discovered there is a difference, evem though I love them all so very much. Usually, I have now come to know (as other grandparents confirmed my suspicions that I had, indeed, "favorites".....they say it is different with grandchildren What makes the difference. First, that very FIRST GRANDCHILD is like no other..he/she whatever the sex, is sooo very special, as you are seeing your child have a child and you are witnessing another generation, and in my case, that first one is sooo very loving and caring...he verbalizes it; he expresses it, and I absolutely adore him, and he is close; he lives in the same city. When they are not nearby, omgoodness, it does make a difference; you are unable to bond, and in my case, I have had problems with being the "inlaw"...most of the grandmothers of their sons' children are treated wayyyy beneath their wives own mothers We are not able to help out when they are born; we are more or less treated second..like we are less, and somehow, as time passes, even though we continue to try and try to please and buy for those little ones and the inlaws, it matters not; we are not their family, ,and we are always reminded of that in the distance that we are shown...those little ones don't know this, but we don't get to keep them, as they are far away, and today's generation doesn't even take the time to send the grandmother a Happy Birthday card, if not from them...at least from the grandchildren, and that also is the situation on holidays and any special occasion. In my family, when I married, we alternated the holidays..not these daughters in law.....and they expect the sons to pick up a cardl I always bought for my mother in law..with much love, and did equally with gift giving...what gifts???? You ask now????? You should just be grateful that she buys them something, and perhaps you, without meaning, have enabled the older one to overhear you about your mother, and you treat her different, and maybe that little one gives "grandma" special love that she has not received, it appears from you, and possibly not from your daughter....you need to rethink it again. Also, be grateful that you have a mother that is caring enough to go out and buy; she certainly is not so self centered, that they never get a thing, and now you are miffed at her.....grow up!!!!