#1. If I skip my child's nap, he will sleep longer at night.  Also, the later I put my child to bed, the later he'll sleep in the morning.

Sleep Lady: The more overtired you allow your child to get, the more wired he'll get -- making it harder for him to get sleep and stay asleep.  I know it sounds counter-intuitive but the later your child goes to sleep, the earlier he'll wake up. 
 
#2. Children not sleeping through the night for the first year or two is a fact of life.  It's not worth it to try to battle them. 

Sleep Lady: There is no reason to have sleepless nights for a year or two!  Yes, for a few months, but even around two weeks you can start gradually laying the groundwork by developing a flexible routine and expanding your soothing repertoire for your baby.  By six to eight weeks, putting your baby down drowsy-but-awake at bedtime is possible.  In addition, healthy babies six months or older who are growing well can often sleep 11 hours at night.  Although teething, illness and developmental milestones can disturb sleep at various times, they're only temporary interruptions. 
 
#3. I will have to give up all forms of co-sleeping if I want a baby with good sleep habits.

Sleep Lady: Not true.  Consider an alternative middle ground called "room sharing," where you keep your baby in your room in a crib or co-sleeper for months or even a year.  You can easily feed your baby, it gives you the peace of mind of having him close by, and you don't have to worry about the safety challenges of bedsharing.  Most importantly, you can begin to put your baby down "drowsy-but-awake" at naptime so he can learn to put himself to sleep independently and you are still nearby.  This will make the transition to his own crib and room one day much easier!

#4. Newborns sleep all the time and know what they need.  You don't need to schedule their sleep times.

Sleep Lady: Even very young babies benefit from scheduling and consistency at night time and nap time.  It cuts down on their crankiness and crying, and lays the groundwork for learning how to sleep through the night once they're a little older. 

#5. Children know when they're sleepy and when they should go to bed. 

Sleep Lady: Not once they learn to fight sleep for your company!  Children need our direction and guidance with a soothing bedtime routine to help them slow down and transition to sleep.  Once you get your child on a consistent schedule, you can plan your own day better and can count on having a happy awake child.

#6. Some children, including babies, don't need as much sleep as others.  Also, some children just aren't as good sleepers as others. 

Sleep Lady: Very few children need less than the average amount of sleep for their age.  They need enough good quality sleep to grow and learn at the incredible rates they do!  They need us to protect their need for sleep.  Yes, some baby's temperaments make it more challenging to learn to go to sleep, but every child can learn this essential life skill. 
 
#7. If I let my child "cry it out" at bedtime, I can do whatever it takes (rock, walk, nurse, bottle feed, etc.) to get him back to sleep in the middle of the night. 
 
Sleep Lady: Once your baby is over 6 months of age, you must be consistent at bedtime AND all night wakings.  If he becomes accustomed to being fed, rocked, walked, etc. during the night, that is what he will need and expect each time he wakes up in order to go back to sleep.  He won't understand why you are doing it sometimes and not other times.

#8. If I feed my baby late at night, he will sleep longer.

Sleep Lady: A baby will sleep for a longer stretch when he no longer needs to eat at night AND if he knows how to put himself back to sleep without being fed.

#9. Feeding my child formula rather than relying on breast-feeding in the evening will help her sleep longer.

Sleep Lady: It may help her sleep longer since formula takes longer to digest, but it won't make a difference if she doesn't know how to put herself back to sleep without nursing or bottle feeding.
 
#10. It doesn't matter where my baby sleeps -- in a stroller or riding in the car is just as good as at home.  Sleep is sleep.
 
Sleep Lady: Motion lulls babies to sleep.  However, it keeps them in a light sleep -- not the restorative deeper sleep they need.  If your baby does fall asleep while riding in the car or stroller, transfer him to his crib as soon as you can.  Or, you could just park the car in your driveway and flip through a magazine or pay the bills while he snoozes.  An occasional motion nap is not a problem.  You just don't want it to be the only way your baby can go to sleep.  

#11. Dads can't help much with a baby's bedtime routine if a baby is breast-feeding. 
 
Sleep Lady: Even if you're breast-feeding, there's no reason to ban Dad from the nursery.  After you nurse, hand him the baby for burping, swaddling, and the rest of the nightly ritual.  He'll probably come up with his own versions of soothing techniques.  While Dad finishes up with the baby, you can spend quality time with your older kids, if you have them, or just put your feet up and relax.  You deserve it!
 
#12. It will spoil my baby if I go to him every time he cries. 
 
Sleep Lady: Taking care of your baby's needs isn't the same as coddling.  If you don't respond to your baby, he may get the message he's not important.  It's vital to developing a secure attachment -- in other words, he'll know that when he cries someone always comes.  And a secure attachment is key to healthy self-esteem later in life.  So when your baby cries, give him a few seconds to settle down, then check to see what might be bothering him.