Recently, as a new friend and I were driving along, discussing relationships (a topic never far from most women's conversations), Linda inquired about my book, Successful Second Marriages.  This new friend was curious about the content, the people I had interviewed for the book, and, lastly, me!  I found the shift in subject matter focusing on me to be a little unnerving.  Her question hung in the air.  "Why had I chosen this topic, remarriage, to write about?"  

It is always with reluctance that I admit to two unsuccessful marriages, thus, the premise for my book.  As I summed up the personal history of my marriages and divorces, I was amazed to hear this 50 plus year old divorcee giving "kudos" to me for "trying" again.  Linda has been divorced for 30 years, has dated, but is cautious about remarriage.  "I think highly of my friends who chose to marry again --– making another attempt at marriage.  I think it is great having just given me praise for remarrying again, and, again!  I was compelled to say to her, "then why haven't you taken a second chance?"

"I enjoy dating, I enjoy male companionship, and I especially like having a guy attend social events with me.  I have come close to marriage, but I like my life as it is."

What Linda revealed about herself was not so different from the message imparted to me from the couples I had interviewed for my book.  They were happy with their remarried state, but they had good advice for "pre" remarriage: know yourself, be content with yourself, be comfortable being alone, give yourself time as a single person before entering marriage again. 

Linda's life is full -- she volunteers, she travels, she has a wide group of friends, and we both love our yoga classes.  She has found contentment with "Linda."  Isn't this what we all need to strive for, happiness and contentment with the self, before taking a chance with Mr. Second Time or like me, Mr. Third (and last!) Time?